A Legacy of Faith and Teachings

I don’t even recognize the place anymore. All the old families are gone. I go to South Fellowship now. They have a great youth group. My grandchildren love it.

I can’t attend Cherry Hills anymore. The music is too loud. I might consider filing a lawsuit. My audiologist tells me I have significant hearing damage after attending just just 3 weeks.

Cherry Hills Community Church is the best church I’ve ever attended. These folks are so naive that I’ve already brought 500 people into my Primerica network! I’ve sold so many policies that I’ll be able to retire by the time I turn 23!

Cherry Hills Christian Middle School is the best investment I’ve ever made into my children’s future. My eldest son just got his PHD from Princeton after getting a full ride scholarship after graduating from Valor. My youngest daughter just entered the 7th grade. She loves the lesson material prepared by the Bible teacher and has started reading her King James Bible on her own time. She says she likes the archaic language and diagrams in the facsimile copy of the original I bought for her. She’s been watching some historian on YouTube and says there’s something very special on page 137. According to this man, the text was prepared by Shakespeare. I just wish she would do her math homework. All she does when she gets home from school is watch YouTube videos about church history and it’s affecting her other studies.

Cherry Hills Community Church is better than Red Rocks Amphitheater! And it’s free. I take some Molly every Sunday morning before I show up! But it’s also kinda awful. There are a lot of homeless folks on blues hanging around too because of the food bank.

I miss the sermons that actually taught from the Bible. I go to Littleton United Methodist Now. My mom is getting old and she misses the old Cherry Hills Choir.

The flashing lights nearly triggered an epileptic episode. I’m researching for the proper attorney to file a class action lawsuit.

I saw one of the grandchildren of the man who molested me when I was 3 coming out of the coffeeshop with his father. I’m networking with some of the other children who were abused by the fellowship of men who were doing this in the old days to file a class action lawsuit. I don’t think the church is liable, the men were never official members of the congregation. They just pretended to be sincere.

Praise be to God.  I am born again.  I’ve heard rumors that one of the former pastor’s sons isn’t taking his meds and is slandering the church.  But I love this place.  It’s the only church in the city where I can hear the music.  I have considerable hearing loss from being in a punk rock band in my early 20s.

Praise be to God.  I am born again.  I’ve heard rumors that one of the former pastor’s sons isn’t taking his meds and is slandering the church.  But I love this place.  It’s the only church in the city where I can hear the music.  I have considerable hearing loss from being in a punk rock band in my early 20s.

Yuppies must have special immunity.  My cat was run over by one of the youth vehicles and my Injury Lawyer was only able to get $9.99 in reparations.  I used it to buy a large print bible for myself off the internet.  I love this church and all the people, but can’t see any of the writing in the pew Bibles.